I dunno y I'm showing baby my fucked up attitude after my dance lesson. Haiis. I dun mean it. Serious. Just dunno y he can go find mel but cant find mi. I not depriving him off his freedom. Just tat he doesnt noe tat I realli do misses him hella much. Coz of him, I left my teck whye "frens" so-called lah. But I noe tis kinda fren dun hv oso sua instead it will be better for mi. But Joanne left mi too. I mean YES, I agree tat Jo will tempt mi to do bad tiings AT TIMES but overall, she understands mi and we both shared good and bad memories tgt. I dunno why, but at times I feel lonely. Very Lonely. Like I was being left all alone. I noe I got mani gd frens and all! But I can feel the emptiness inside my hartt. I admit tat I'm afraid of loneliness. I hate tat kind of feeling as if someone u depend greatly on, abandon u and u hv no one else there tat u will trust animre. Terrible man. I dunno y I get tis kind of feelings suddenly, mabe is coz I miss baby too much and he doesnt even realised it. EVEN IF HE DOES, I dun think it will make big diff aniwae. Recently, I will get sad for no specific reason. Is my depression getting worst or wad!? I might end up going "Hougang Chalat" without mi knowing whats going on.. My studies is doiing just GREAT! So so much better and I thinks tat I'm the top 5 in my class. Coz I heard tat all of them got at least 3 or 5 C already. As for my police case, thinks tat it should be too much of a problem. My family? Though at times my parents still kp mi but it's getting better. Since I'm doing fine in all tis area den WHY THE FUCK am I not happy? Wad am i stressing about? I seriously have no fucking idea wad's going wrong in my life now... NO ONE UNDERSTAND MI AT ALL. Coz I dun even understand myself. Baby didnt give mi goodnight kiss and we didnt tok after 9PM. Hate it. As I am blogging now, I am crying at the same time. And no 1 noes my pain..How wonderful..

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